I am a self-confessed lover of lists and am happy to share this little obsession with anyone, it even gets a mention in the About section of this Blog. Having long given up worrying about whether people think I am a Tosser or a weirdo, as my sons refer to me on occasion, I am happy to declare to the world my love of lists and spreadsheets. Spreadsheets take my list adoration to the next level!
The IMPORTANCE OF A Bucket List
One very important list collection I have is the Bucket List Collection. Not one but 3 Bucket Lists that I add to too help ensure my work life blend is fulfilling, enjoyable, brings a level of challenge and excitement and also rids me of things that no longer serve me.
While I was a Trustee of Ellie’s Fund – Brain Tumour Trust between 2010 and 2017, one of the very important things Ellie’s Mum, Heather, and Step Dad, Jason, taught my family and I was the importance of making memories. Ellie had a brain tumour and died at the age of 14, helping the family to create a legacy charity in her name, and the work that charity did, changed my life and my whole way of thinking. I have since gone on and helped create two further legacy funds, the Andrew McGeown Legacy Fund and the #BeMoreMandy Fund, voluntary work that makes me realise how short and precious life is and that we need to live it. Often easier said than done I know but Bucket Lists really do help with that.
The Travel Bucket List
Mr B and I first created our Travel Bucket List in 2016. We each put together a list with 10 places on that we wanted to visit. We both had New York on our lists because we had wanted to go there for our Honeymoon in 1998 but we had just bought a house that needed gutting, a month before our youngest son was born and then we got married, all in a space of 5 months. Needless to say, New York was off the Honeymoon List, we went to Paris instead, but got added to the Bucket List nearly 20 years later. In November last year we celebrated 25 years of marriage. As part of our gift to each other we went to New York to bring in 2024. It was an amazing trip and one that will stay in the Memory Bank forever, or at least as long as I have a functioning memory anyway.
My list included the Isle of Eigg, someone I knew had been there and it sounded fascinating. It is no longer on my Travel Bucket List, we have a Top Ten to make choosing easier and Eigg has slipped down into the lower twenties. I have spoken to lots of people since then who have visited lots of interesting places. After a little research those places can easily find their way on to Mr & Mrs B’s Travel Bucket List – Mr B doesn’t take much persuading to travel and visit new places.
On Mr B’s list is ‘Benidorm with Mrs B’. Unfortunately this does not appear to be slipping below the Top Ten no matter how hard I try push it down. He takes a Lads Trip there regularly. I use the term Lad loosely, he is 58 but apparently, according our sons, who usually go with him on said trips, he still thinks he is 18. I have absolutely no interest in visiting, though having watched an episode of Spectacular Spain with Alex Polizzi some years ago, I was pleasantly surprised. I will never say never but until Mr B takes charge of travel arrangements it is unlikely to happen.
In 2019, I bought Mr B a really useful book – Lonely Planet’s Where To Go When. Obviously, it got a little dusty on our bookcase over the couple of years that followed but it is a great reference for understanding what part of the world to visit at certain times of year. I highly recommend it, I am a big lover of Lonely Planet travel books.
If you do not have a Travel Bucket List I really suggest you get one to help you discover new places, cultures and, a very important thing in our life, food.
Fun, Happiness & Adventure Bucket List
The latest addition to my Bucket List collection is my Fun, Happiness and Adventure Bucket List. This list has been created for the things I want to achieve as part of my personal development, experience building or to tick off my ‘Achievements That People Thought I Wouldn’t Do’ List. Some of the entries on this list are the things that I have received an eye roll from Mr B or other family members for when I have mentioned them. This only leads me to think ‘F*!kit, I will show you!’ – the F*!kit Bucket is another Bucket List entirely.
At the moment the Fun, Happiness and Adventure Bucket List includes:
Lifestyle & Travel Writing – the reason The Midlife Lane came about.
Hosting and Comparing Events – it is something I used to do but it has been a while, my first gig for this is BoB Club Scarborough’s Business Showcase Event on Sunday 19th May.
Organising intimate events that promote a business – I held one for my client, Wolds Restaurant, Flixton, in February and it was a huge success.
Midlife Modelling – inspired by three lovely ladies who I have the pleasure of knowing, Rachel Peru, Annie Stirk and Bernadette Gledhill who are all keen to promote that ageism is never in style.
Bringing together small groups of business owners to support and promote each other while helping to enhance their business and their life – exactly why I wrote my Work Life Blend Programme that the first cohort of women, interestingly all Midlifers, are now taking part in. I have also launched Don’t Walk With Tossers. A walking and talking group for business owners and managers who just want to get out in the fresh air and meet like minded people. The fisrt one takes place in Scarborough on Friday 19th April 2024 and future ones will be held on the Yorkshire Coast, the beautiful part of the world where I live.
All these things are included in my Work Life Blend plan that helps to fill my energy cup, enhance my life and bring me joy. Some of them allow me to get out in nature and allow time just for me. Though this might not seem like it to you, some of this is part of my self-care routine.
Remember you are never too old to learn a new skill, start something new or find adventure.
The F*!kit Bucket
And then there is the F*!kit Bucket List. Having one of these is essential so when you really have had one of those weeks, are being irritated by someone or need to rid that thing from your life because it is creating negative energy, time and brain space it can go in this virtual bucket. Add it to a list, write about it, it’s like my Little Book of Tossers, it will take journaling to a whole new level and can be very cathartic.
My good friend of more than 30 years, Helen Crawford , introduced me to the need for a F*!kit Bucket at a difficult time in her midlife. She advised me a bottomless one is best because sometimes there is a lot of stuff that needs to go in there.
If you don’t have a Bucket List get one, or maybe three. There is no limit to the buckets you can fill to add help with your midlife adventures, motivation and enjoyment. TB